Hope

For the longest time I've longed to know what "hope" means.  These 3 remain... Faith. Hope. Love.  How is hope different than faith?  How is it different than expectation?

Our miscarried baby has ended up with the name "Hope".  We don't know if it was a boy or a girl.  I have the feeling it was a girl, but I don't think we would have named her Hope had she been born.  Hope is the name because we think that hope is the thing that has been born to us in this season.

When we saw the ultra-sound, a baby without a heart beat and not quite the right shape - Faith is what I had.  I dove off the high dive heading toward a pool with no water.  My faith proclaimed that water would be in the pool by the time I reached it.  This time it didn't work out.  It's a painful thing hitting the bottom, not just the loss of the baby but also the stretch of faith seemed to fail.  I don't apologize for my faith in the miraculous.  I've seen and heard too much.  I'm confident that the Father is not a fan of miscarriages.  I don't believe there are miscarriages in heaven; I don't believe miscarriages were a part of his design of Eden.  This pain is a result of the fall and they are a tool of the enemy to steal, kill and destroy.  Unfortunately for the enemy, the Father is so good that he can take any act of aggression towards us from the enemy and turn it around to bless us....

This is where hope comes in.

Hope is clinging to the goodness of God and the expectation to see Him release His goodness at the moment that your body is crushed on the concrete of a waterless pool.  Hope comes when the thing you had faith for, 100% certainty for crumbles into nothingness.  Whatever the outcome, despite the current mystery, the Father is good, He is kind and He will prevail.

I feel Him clearly say that my faith was a beautiful offering to Him - and now my hope is a beautiful offering as well.

I can't say how this will turn out or what it will look like, but I know someday I will look back and see clearly the Love of the Father exploding in my life in this season.  I already have a revelation of hope to show for it....